It's been a while. Many things have changed. I'm not even going to try to pick up where I left off. This post probably won't make any sense but that's pretty much how my life is. Things just happen without a rhyme or reason and there's nothing I can do about it, for now. Right now my living situation is a nightmare. I'm not going into any more detail than that because it seriously upsets me, but it is absolutely horrible and has me wishing for rock bottom so that I can claw my way out of this hole and start over. For me, starting over means moving so very far away. There are more reasons to go than to stay, but one huge reason to stay is my job. I can't ignore it, but I've thought about it a lot and it's probably the best thing I can do for myself. I'd hate to have lived my entire life in the same 30 mile radius. I travel a lot, but moving is completely different. I was thinking about it a couple days ago and realized I have to get a new EVERYTHING. New job, new friends, new hangouts, new car insurance, even new doctors. That's a lot of new. I'm starting to become overwhelmed. But, there is a person there waiting for me and everything I must do in order to make it happen will be worth it. He's worth it to me. As for my friends here, I know that no matter what we'll still be friends. They are who I am. I love them all for different reasons. Everyone of them has contributed to helping me become the person I am today. They know me almost as well as I know myself and that kind of friendship doesn't just disappear.
I guess this whole idea of moving is a lot to deal with and since it's not happening right away I have a lot of time to think about it. I'm still very excited to go, but I want to go now. I'm impatient and scared. I just hope that he's not as impatient as I am, otherwise this will have all been for nothing.
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